And no, I'm not talking about the ability to look at yourself in the mirror.
I'm talking about the "gift" of being able to walk...unassisted.
Last week I had knee surgery, and for the last two weeks I've been crutching around town. Along with the knee surgery came some other unforeseen minor complications:
- Since the surgery was on my right knee, and since the doctors orders were to basically not do anything with that leg, I haven't been alowed to drive. Boom - Independence gone.
- The main problem with crutches is that walking just a couple of blocks can be exhausting, so travelling long distances on foot (and by "foot," I mean literally ONE foot) is not an option
- A further complication with crutches is that your ability to hold anything while standing is gone. Just to get a bowl of cereal means I have to grab the bowl, set it on the counter, shimmy to the left, stop and move the bowl to the left, shimmy again, move the bowl, etc...until I get to the edge of the kitchen and within plopping distance of the couch where I can sit down and reach the bowl. Going to the kitchen to get food is such a pain that I've opted to just skip my normal snacking (probably good since my normal activity level is way down).
- The first 3 nights after the surgery, I had to sleep with this huge knee immobilizer brace thing on my leg which was heavy, uncomfortable, and hot.
(In my best Braveheart voice) Freeeeeeeeeeeedooooooooome!!!
I will say this though...the crutches also had an unforeseen BENEFIT.
On Saturday, I went out for about an hour and a half for a friends birthday, and I tell you this: I was approached by four different women within an hour who were offering me their seat, asking me if I was alright, and generally showering me with attention and I was literally doing NOTHING.
Huh...maybe I should go back to the Doc and see if I can keep the crutches for another couple of weeks?
The attention however was unfortunately not just limited to those carrying x-chromosomes. I had a small encounter later that evening. I was hanging out with some friends at a lounge when a HUGE dude (I'm talkin like 6'8", muscles ripping out of his shirt, Jamaican dude) comes up to me. The encounter went like this:
Big Muscle Dude: "Hey Dude. I don't know where you're from, but you're F**kin Beautiful!"
Me: "Uhh....thanks man, I appreciate that"
BMD: "My name's Abdule. What's your name and where you from?!"
Me: "I'm Arun. My family's from India"
BMD: "Mmm Mmm Mmm! Beautiful name, country, AND body. What's it gonna take for you to let me buy you a drink?"
Me: "I appreciate the offer man, but I'm with some friends and I'm straight"
BMD: "Oh ok man, but if you change your mind, I'll be here and you won't have to buy another drink tonight."
I mean, I suppose its flattering. This type of thing has happened before, and I always try to be nice, but on this occasion I made sure to be particularly cordial because BMD aka Abdule could have kicked (or taken) my ass if he wanted! With my limited mobility, escape would have been impossible!
Oh, those crutches. Attention grabbing would be an understatement.