Arun is Bringing You...Your Daily Remedy

Tuesday, May 29, 2012

The Three Date First Date

And as promised, today we get to the entertaining and unconventional story of a first date I went on with a girl I was dating earlier this year.  As you'll find out, her nickname, "Giggles" is very "a propos."

But lets be honest...this is me.  Did you expect anything less than entertaining and unconventional??

Now most guys might give you the "Joe Cool" version of how things went down where they are a totally confident charmer who plays everything perfectly and the girl falls totally all over him.

But that's not entertaining in the least.  OBVIOUSLY I'm confident and smooth, but anyone would be lying if they didn't tell you they have insecure and dorky concerns running through there head on a daily basis. I prefer to reveal all of the hidden dorkiness in its full hilarity.

So we agreed to meet at a "trendy" bar/restaurant in La Jolla.  Now normally, I prefer to do "first dates" in areas I'm more familiar with (ie closer to my house), because then we can "discover" some charming hidden spot and I appear like a cultured hero.

Since I've lived in La Jolla though, its changed so damn much that I only know a couple of neat places.  I had heard this place called Barfly was pretty hip, so I thought I'd try my luck with Giggles.

As I'm driving over, Giggles informs me she's going to be a little late at which point I walk down from my parking spot and take the picture you see above...I live in a terrible city, I know.

I walk over to the restaurant to see what this hip & trendy spot will have in store for us, and am a little shocked as I walk in...

Completely. Empty.

And when I say "completely empty," I mean that there's not a damn person in the place and a waitress across the way is hanging out in the kitchen and chatting with the cook because she obviously has nothing else to do.

Arun - Strike 1.

I walk back out in mini-panic.  I chose the place. Now I look like a schmuck who doesn't know how to pick decent, let alone trendy places.  I run through the options in my mind and I see Giggles coming around the corner.

More Panic.

My eyes dart around for immediate options in view:

Candy Store - too casual.
Massage Place - too weird.
Smash Burger - Too gassy.

The options had dried up and Giggles had arrived! So I said the first thing that came to mind:

"Your in luck...I decided to rent the place out for just us!"

Luckily, I'm quick with the jokes.

So we sit down and the waitress comes over to take our drink orders:

Me: "I'll take a Mojito!"
Giggles: "I'll have a Ginger Ale...I don't really drink"

For those of you who are quick - YES, I planned a date, at a bar, with a girl who (it turns out) doesn't drink.

Strike 2.

In another bout of amazing preparation, I had been drinking a lot of water and coffee that day which resulted in the explosive urge to urinate literally every 30 minutes throughout the evening.

We stay for maybe an hour (during which I make two trips to the restroom) and actually have a really good time at which point we both start getting hungry. In my amazing planning, I neglected to look at the quality of the menu which as it turns out, is astonishingly mediocre.

Strike 3.

I suggest a Thai restaurant I know and we walk over - date #2.  On the walk over, we pass a cute old couple undoubtedly wrapping up their own date night (it was like 7 o'clock which is well-passed old-person bed time).

This is perfect.  Old people and I have a mutual adoration from each other.  I always get along with them and engage them, and they always tell me how great I'd be for their grand daughters.  We chatted for a bit as we walked, by the end of which the Grandma had said I was a "VERY nice boy," the two of us were a "very nice looking couple," and "don't stay out too late!".

Apparently, Grandma was my wingman for the night.

We get to the restaurant and after another trip to the restroom, we mull over menu options.  If there's any menu I know, it's Thai food.  So, I suggest two awesome dishes - one rice dish, and another noodle dish.

Giggles: "Actually, I don't really eat rice and noodles"

Strike 4 Arun.

We end up ordering two amazing non-rice, non-noodle dishes.  Now anyone who knows me, knows I absolutely LOVE dessert.  So I start chatting about the most amazing carrot cake I've ever had.  Surprisingly, Giggles is adamant that we have it TONIGHT, so after another trip for bladder relief, we drive over to the carrot cake restaurant - date #3.

This restaurant is actually a really nice place.  It's late at this point, with not many people left.  We sit by the bar as a piano player performs jazzy tunes and order the carrot cake...along with two cocktails.

Yes...Giggles is now having a drink for the second time ever in her life.  Either she's having a good time, or she's drowning the pain of an evening with "4-strikes, No-Bladder, Arun".

We enjoy our dessert and cocktails...but there's a slight problem.  The drink she ordered is not good, and nearly undrinkable.  We power through half of it, but neither of us are the type to send something back.  The waitress however was super attentive, noticed we were struggling, and insisted on remaking the drink.

Giggles started drinking the new drink, but the waitress sensed it was still unsatisfactory.  We insisted on keeping the drink, but she would not relent and made yet another completely different drink.

Giggles found this delicious.

We finished our drinks, and by now we're the only people left.  I visit my favorite room one more time for lower abdominal relief, and Giggles and I walk outside.

Now if you've ever wondered what happens to someone who doesn't drink when she drinks two fairly potent on.

Now normally I'm pretty funny, but all of sudden as we're walking outside, Giggles is laughing at everything I say.  When I nicknamed her "Giggles," she was double over in stitches. At first I figured that I was just on an incredible roll of hilarity, but when I noticed her balance a little off, I realized what had happened.

Yes, Giggles was drunk.

Arun - Strike 5 (or possibly Giggles - strike 1?)

I'll spare you from any mushy end-of-date details, but I took her home, reassured her that she did nothing foolish (preserving others egos are situations where I feel its ok to lie a bit), and date #4 was scheduled for the next day.

Somehow, 5 strikes and a bladder with the control of a 97 year old woman did not dissuade her from me.

Apparently, she's more into bowlers than baseball players.

Friday, May 4, 2012

The First Date Setup

I promised in the last post that I would share the story of meeting and subsequently dating a girl I was seeing earlier this year because its kind of an interesting story.  It's also very typically "me" in the way things panned out.

This story has two parts:  The first date setup, and the actual date which are each funny in their own right.  Today is all about the meeting and setup.

For the sake of keeping *some* discretion for others, I'll just use one of her favorite nicknames to refer to her in this post - "Giggles" (ok, maybe not really...she said it sounds silly, hence I will continue calling her that in this blog, and everywhere else).  This nickname will make sense by the end of the second part.

It all started one warm, sunny San Diego morning in January (I love the weather here).  As a designated "ambassador" for my business school, I was supposed to go to this "mixer" where prospective students would be asking questions and mingling with current students.

Naturally, I forgot.

I did eventually arrive (an hour late...oops) and b-lined it straight for the food table (surprise of the century, I know).

Me being me, I started joking around with and generally harassing the fellow ambassadors around me.  I turn towards the window and see this really cute prospective student (and YES, she was a girl) leaning back with six current (male) students surrounding her itching to impress.

Yes, it was a shark tank and there was a nice juicy (and I do mean JUICY) piece of Palestinian meat that the sharks were circling.

Ahh the power of an attractive woman.

Now the average Joe might walk away and wait for the men to disperse or for her to have a free moment.  But this is me.  I am neither average nor rational.  Reckless abandon with no regard for personal ego is more my style.

Then, I see her and another current student looking deeply into each others eyes. Again, the average Joe may sulk away in defeat here...but this was too good for me to pass up. Plus I've seen this move before.

"Oh. My. God!...either you've already fallen in love, or he's showing you his 'Look I have different colored eyes' thing"

Giggles: "haha, he DOES have different colored eyes!...Look!"

Ok, her defense, the different colored eyes thing is quite a trip, and I have previously spent a good 30 seconds gazing deeply into his delicate yet supple eyes, but I digress.

I pirouetted my way into the group and she and I talked for a few minutes (about what, I don't remember, but she was laughing a lot so I imagine I was obviously quite charming ) but she soon left to go sit in on some classes.

I honestly thought I'd probably never see her again, but I told the admissions ladies that I we should really heavily recruit her since she's a stellar candidate and if need be, I will take her out...only for recruitment purposes of course (common people I'm a professional!).

For some reason, they rolled their eyes and shook their heads...apparently this isn't their typical recruitment strategy.

Later that afternoon, I was in the study lounge working away when a friend mentioned to me that there was a really cute girl sitting at the restaurant right around the corner.

Could this be the same girl?  Either way, cute girls are good and I was due for a little break anyways so I left to find out...but I never made it.

As I was walking over to the restaurant, I spot Giggles in the distance on her phone. By a stroke of amazing luck, two of my school friends happened to be chatting about 20 feet in front of where Giggles was, so I stopped to chat hoping I could buy enough time until she's off the phone.

Had my friends not been their, I have no idea what I would've done while she was on the phone...

Stop and tie and re-tie my shoe 17 times while waiting for her to get off the phone?

Hide around the corner of the building waiting like a lion to pounce as soon as the conversation is finished?

Do a solo Mexican Cha-Cha followed by the Tush-Push to get her so confused that she wraps up her call just to watch the spectacle?

Luckily, I didn't have to execute any of my well-thought-out back-up plans.

Giggles wrapped up and coincidentally, I abruptly ended the conversation with my friends just after she got off the phone.

We started chatting again and I knew it was "on" when she followed me to the little corner store so I could buy a snack before class.

In my mind I fist pumped and did one of those jumping heel click things.  On the surface I was as smooth and cool as always (which is obviously SUPER smooth, and SUPER cool).

You can see from the picture on the left that my double heel click form is immaculate.

As a "business school ambassador" I offered to exchange numbers with her to *cough* answer any questions *cough* and possibly hang out since she's relatively new to San Diego.

Yes, I know, I am an amazing Ambassador who goes beyond the call of duty just to service my community...and I'm devilishly handsome to boot!

I was out of town the following weekend, but I when I got back, I texted her to meet up for a happy hour.

She replied:

"My cousin is in town for the weekend...can we all do something together?"

Now I don't know about you, but these are not exactly the magic words I want to here when I want to go out with a cute I have to charm not only her but her cousin too?!?  This was not ideal, but luckily I read this book once called The Social Charmer that explains everything about being charming ;)

A day or so passes and the night before our little group meetup, I get this text from Giggles: "This just in: my cousin went back to LA tonight"

You know those times when you're really excited but you have to stifle it in order to look cool?  Well this was one of those times.  I'm smiling and fist pumping at the fact that now we can go out, just the two of us while at the same time texting:

"Ah too bad, it would've been nice to meet him"

No I'm not above stiffling my inner dork on occasion to look cool...even I have moments of weakness.

The day arrived of our little date and....well you'll just have to wait for the next post to hear about it.

Stay tuned.

And for those of you who happened to find this page looking for advice on setting up the first date, please don't follow anything that I've done...well, except for the Mexican Cha Cha and Tush Push - that move never fails to get the ladies.