Arun is Bringing You...Your Daily Remedy

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Traffic School...and How to Get Out of A Ticket


I was leaving a parking lot on the UC Irvine Campus after catching up with an old friend and enjoying Boba Tea: possibly the weirdest beverage ever concocted. It's basically flavored iced tea with giant tapioca balls in the bottom that you suck up through a straw as big as your mouth. You either love it or hate it. I happen to be a fan.

Thoroughly satisfied with my venture into beverage bizzaro-world, I got in my car to head back to San Diego. When I got to the parking lot exit, the intersection was wide open. No light. Just a simple right or left turn. Right takes me into campus - as much as I enjoy hanging out on dead college campuses, I decided to pass. Left takes me to the freeway...BINGO!

As I start going, I notice a little wrench in my genius plan to turn left. A "no left-turn" sign.

I had already started moving into the intersection, so backing up would've been silly. I suppose I could have veered and made a right turn, but then I would've ended up deep in the UCI campus...who knows what kind of violent gangsters hang out there.

Screw it. I'm GOING! The road was completely clear.

As I pull up to the light, I notice a cop pull up behind me. At this point I'm thinking "Ooh, better be careful now!"

As the light turns green, I slowly and deliberately accelerate into the intersection abiding utmost safety...

BOOM! Lights on, siren whaling....damn.

Lousy, Stupid, Unforgiving Cop: "Do you know why I pulled you over?"
Me: "No sir"
Lousy, Stupid, Unforgiving Cop: "No left turn sign"
Me: "Sorry, I didn't see it. This is my first time on UCI campus and...."
Lousy, Stupid, Unforgiving Cop: "License and Registration"

He didn't even let me try and work the sympathy. I was going to test my acting and see if I could squeeze out a couple of tears. If that didn't work, I was gonna take a water bottle, pour it in my crotch, and tell him I really had "to go" bad and that's why I made the turn. The embarrassment of a grown man giving his pants his own personal hose-down should be enough to avoid the ticket, right?

Instead he returned with a scribbly written up ticket.

Me: "Is there any way I can be let off with a warning today?"
Lousy, Stupid, Unforgiving Cop: "Sorry man, I already wrote it."

Sorry? SORRY!?! Oh Paaalease, you're not sorry. If you're so damn sorry you would've given me a chance to see if my rebutal was worthy of a warning!

So I got a ticket. Big deal. All I have to do is pay the fine and do the joke that is known as online traffic school to keep my insurance status quo, right?

Welp, conveniently, Orange County is like the ONLY freaking county in California that doesn't allow online traffic school. Instead, I have to do eight hours...yes EIGHT HOURS of classroom traffic school! And to add insult to injury, I have to PAY EXTRA just to go to the damn class.

I hate no left turn signs.

So the last two nights, I attended traffic school. It's amazing how many people don't think they deserve to be there. Pretty much how everyone in prison insists on their innocence. Honestly, sure my ticket was ticky-tack, but I am technically guilty, so I couldn't really claim to not deserve to be there.

Well, that's the price to pay for being a dangerous rebel with no regard for the law, like me!

As people were sharing their "alleged violations", I started feeling like a cream puff. There were people who had multiple violations with WEEKS! I was surrounded by red light runners, repeat offenders, and people caught going 50 mph over the speed limit, and here I am with a measly left turn at a no left-turn sign.

It's like being in a prison surrounded by murders, kidnappers, and rapists when all you did was shoplift. I couldn't let them think I'm soft or else I could be a target! I had to come up with something fast! I had to be a hardened traffic violator that they wouldn't mess with!

Somehow, nobody believed my story of being in a high speed pursuit down the California Coast in my Toyota Corolla.

Traffic School was not nearly as bad as I thought it would be though. If you happen to be unfortunate enough to have to attend an actual class, I'd recommend doing it through My Improv Comedy Traffic School.

Basically, my class was taught by a stand-up comedian. His name is Tony Scaduto and he used to work in Vegas and has actually done a couple of mediocre movies no one's ever heard of back in the 70's. He was pretty darn funny, and made the class go by a lot faster. He also shared a couple of VERY interesting facts.

Fact 1: If you want to avoid a ticket, drive in the number 3 lane on the freeway. 60% of tickets are issued to drivers in the number 1 lane ("fast" lane - big surprise, I know). 30% in the number 2 lane. 6% in the number 4 lane and a whopping 4% in the number 3 lane. Play the odds and you should increase your chances of being ticket-free.

Fact 2: Never admit guilt when the officer asks you if you know why he pulled you over. They take notes, so in case you decide to fight the ticket, he won't have anything to use against you, such as an admission of guilt.

Fact 3: Statistically, bright cars (red, yellow, etc) are ticketed way more often than neutral ones purely because they standout more. So if a pack of cars is speeding, the brighter car is usually the one that's caught and ticketed.

Fact 4: This is a BIG one. Wanna know how to get out of a ticket? This one works for surface roads. When you go to court, during the hearing, ask the officer if he has a copy of the city code speed regulations for the street where you were ticketed. This is information anyone can obtain from City Hall.

Why is this important? Because streets many times have codes that allow different speed limits at different times of the day. The posted speed limit is always the lowest speed limit of them all. Theoretically speaking, you could have been going within the speed limit if the regulation for that time of day allows for it.

The beauty of this is, if the officer does NOT have a copy of the official speed regulations for that street in court with him, he can't prove you were breaking the law. Even if you WERE breaking the speed regulation for that time of day, if he doesn't have a copy of the code, he can't prove you guilty, and since we're in the good ol' USA, you're INNOCENT until PROVEN guilty. It doesn't seem likely that he would have a copy with him (although I've never been to traffic court).

Of course, this is all moot if you're going over 60mph on a surface road.

So I actually ended up learning something new (and here I was thinking I knew it ALL :)

This probably won't benefit me though since I'm not really a speeder. I used to, but I decided to make an effort to SLOW DOWN with things in general and not be in such a rush all the time. It's great. Now I just cruise around, stress free, not having to worry about changing lanes too often, getting great gas mileage, and never having to worry about the Po-Po.

I still think going on a "hot-pursuit" would be super fun, but I guess I'll wait until I get a Lamborghini before doing that :)

Thursday, September 18, 2008

The Quarter Century Mark

I am old.

Early Twenties? Long Gone.

Late Early-Twenties? Years ago.

Early Mid-twenties? Buh-bye

Welcome, Arun, to the wonderful world of old people. The Quarter-Century club.

I vividly remember what a big deal my sister thought it was when I hit "double digits" - the big 1-0. Then, I remember the feeling of finally turning an actual teenager! I used to think, "gee, in the year 2000, I'm gonna be 16!" That seemed so old. I never contemplated what I'd be in the year 2008.

So 24 came and went. Knowing me, you're probably all guessing that I did something wild and crazy for my birthday! A new adventure! Shenanigans and chaos!

You'd be wrong.

I never like making a big deal out of my birthday. As much as you all know I like attention, I like to EARN it by being "Smooth Arun." Not because I happened to be born on a certain day. So what did I do on my birthday?

Well, I went to work, did a grueling workout (wasn't going to let the birthday excuse let me out of it!), and came home. But...I had a treat in store later. I had no time to really eat after working out, so for my "birthday dinner" I ate tofu dipped in soy sauce, and a mango. My friends offered to take me out, but I deferred to the weekend since I had already planned...

A MASSAGE! Sweet God Almighty, this is one of the top five inventions EVER! I decided on a "deep tissue" massage since I figured there's on awful lot of steel-like muscle the therapist would have to work through :) A deep tissue massage is an interesting feeling though. Half the time, I'm so relaxed I want to fall asleep. The other half I'm grimacing in pain, trying not to scream!

It's a "good" pain though. Kind of like the great burn you get when you eat wasabi. All the while I'm thinking "ok...breathe...she's getting the toxins out of your muscles...breathe!..BREATHE!"

When she had me face up, my concentration doubled. As devilishly handsome as I may be, the facial contortions I was making while face down, were not exactly "GQ" cover material.

Afterwards though, I felt amazing. I went to the coffee shop across the street, all set to continue reading my current book, "Anna Karenina," but I met a girl in line who instead convinced me (she didn't have to try very hard) to share a piece of chocolate chip cheesecake with her.

Cheesecake is probably in the top 25 for great inventions.

There goes my healthy dinner.

The rest of the night, I finished replying to all the birthday messages I received. One thing I find irritating, is when people send a mass message out to everyone they know, thanking them for the birthday wishes. I've explained why I dislike this in one of my first blog posts ever.

I feel like if someone is nice enough to remember/notice that it's my birthday, and calls, sends a message, or whatever, they deserve a personal response. Now next, year when I'm insanely famous, and the 1,934,866 members of the "Arun is Awesome" fan club send me birthday wishes, obviously that will be different, but for the time being, everyone gets my personal attention.

But, not to worry! My birthday is not going to pass without some kind of excessive celebration! This weekend, we are making a little hop over to Sin City. Maybe I'll get a little birthday luck on tables!

Welp, onward to 26. So far the Quarter Century Club has welcomed me with open arms. I just think they're happy to have someone with youthful vibrancy, age-old wisdom, and...yes, of course I'm going to say it....the aesthetics of a man in his prime, in the club! But, I won't be running for president anytime soon.

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

YTB: To Join or Not To Join?


Recently (the last couple of years) I've noticed a surge in people I know getting involved with YTB. In fact, in my last post, I got two comments requesting that I do a little ditty on YTB.

For those of you who are clueless as to what I'm talking about, YTB stands for "Your Travel Business." Basically the way it works is that you pay $500 plus $50 a month afterward, and you get an already designed webpage that acts like Travelocity, Expedia, Orbitz, or any other online travel agent. That's right, you basically become a travel agent. Also, when you sign up, you basically do so "under" whomever you heard about YTB from, by going to their travel page, signing up, and paying up.

I'm going to give you an unbiased yet personal view of YTB (and similar companies like Traverus, or World Ventures etc). They all operate pretty much the same with slight differences in sign up fees, compensation plans etc.

So for the last year, a friend of mine has been telling me all about how great YTB is. He's signed up and has been trying to convince me to. I've resisted because I'm a natural skeptic of a plan that is "too good to be true." Also, he's not quite making beaucoup bucks yet, so I had no tangible proof that it's legit.

Then, to satisfy him, I spoke with his "mentor," (the guy he signed up under) a ridiculously rich and successful guy named Maurice Maio and he was pretty convincing...but he also came off as "sales-ey" and since we only spoke briefly, I dismissed the idea of going to a seminar.

Recently though, my friend Heather decided to join YTB full boar, and invited me over to her place for a going away/YTB presentation party (very clever to combine the two) where her "mentor," another ridiculously successful person named Sabrina Dagostino did a full presentation on YTB. Obviously, I was skeptical.

After leaving Heather's house though, I was seriously ready to sign up.

Sabrina is an extremely compelling speaker and it's obvious why she's done well. In the presentation she outlined all of the great benefits in joining YTB:

- As a travel agent, you get free upgrades on travel and hotel.
- Owning your own business means you can write off tons of things for taxes (gas, eating out, etc)
- When people book travel through your site (which is marketed to be as cheap or cheaper than expedia), you make a commission
- When people sign up under you, you make a commission
- Any money that the people under you (and the people under them) make, you get a cut of.

Sounds amazing doesn't it!?! Again it was a very compelling presentation, and my knee-jerk, in-the-moment reaction was, "Where do I sign up!?!"

Luckily, I'm a rational, think-stuff-through-and-research type of person.

First of all, let's think about the presentation. Why is she doing a FREE presentation? Well, it's because anyone who signs up under Heather, is money in the bank for both of them!

Cha-ching!

And if you're thinking this is a pyramid scheme, you'd be essentially right. In her presentation, Sabrina mentioned multiple times that Pyramid schemes are illegal (she's an attorney which added to her credibility), and that YTB is not a pyramid.

Well, if I made a Peach Pie with Nectarines instead, sure it wouldn't be a peach pie, but it sure would taste, smell, and do everything pretty close to what a normal peach pie would do. It may not be "technically" a pyramid scheme, but it damn sure acts like one.

In the presentation, it sounds like you'll be making EASY money for the rest of your life! Well if it was so easy, then why is it that something like 94% of YTB agents make less than $90 per year? (By the way, some of my numbers might be slightly off since I didn't write any of my research down, but they are pretty close).

Another interesting statistic is that only about 14% or YTB's total revenue comes from booking travel. Pretty astounding for a travel business, eh? So where does the rest of the revenue come from? Well 72% of it comes from sign up fees and monthly dues! Hmmm....smells like a peach pie to me.

So in order to make any serious money (or even semi-serious money) you can't really rely on booking travel, unless you book a TON of it. People aren't going to find your webpage on google since there's about 200,000 other YTB travel pages (unless you get tons of people to shamelessly link to you). You might be able to convince your family or friends to book through you, but if you're like me, you like to check a few different websites to get the best deal. I usually check a few (including a friends YTB page), and although they're competitive, I can usually find cheaper rates elsewhere.

That means if I want to make the dough, I need to get people to sign up. This is the biggest problem for me.

I hate salespeople. Actually, I don't hate salespeople, but I really dislike people who try and sell something to you, be it a car, a religion, or a travel business, as if they are just looking out for your well being. Nope. I'm personally a super social person and get along well with everybody, but I would hate to start telling my friends about my travel business to get them to sign up.

Hell, even if it's people I don't know, I find it totally disingenuous to talk about something where their participation nets you a commission.

I suppose it wouldn't be so bad if it was MY company or product (ie the ebook I'm releasing pretty soon), but peddling someone else's product just to make yourself money isn't my cup-o-tea not what I think of as a positive social interaction.

Hell, even with my book, I might mention it in conversation, but I wouldn't try to sell it to anyone I'm socializing with. I'm going to sell it via online marketing. You might see an ad, click on it to get information, and if you like it, you can buy it.

BUT, I wouldn't call YTB a scam by any means. You know EXACTLY what you're financial risk is when you get involved, and in all fairness, it's not that much. What is a little misleading, is how easy they make it seem to get rich. It's not. To make money, you need to really sell the product to people. But as far as I can tell, nothing they claim about the compensation you are awarded is false.

At the end of Sabrina's presentation, I remember she said something like, "you have an option now to change your life. In one year, you can be in the same place you are now, or you can make a change that will affect the rest of your life." Convincing indeed. But you have to keep in mind that 94% of us are not going to be any different except maybe a few hundred bucks in the hole, but we WILL be contributing to her retirement fund! That's not a knock on her, but she's not doing this presentation to change YOUR life...she's doing it to enhance hers.

If I were to sign up, I'd probably give a similar presentation. In fact, she, like other mentors, WANT you to succeed. It behooves them financially if you do well, so they offer all types of free coaching. But, as I mentioned before, it takes a very particular personality type to succeed.

If I were to sign up, I might reap some tax benefits, and travel benefits, but it wouldn't offset the amount of money invested. (Although, once you get six people signed up under you, the $50/month fee is waived. But, again, you have to SELL six people your business plan)

Sabrina Dagostino has enough people signed up under her, where now, she can travel doing presentations, getting people to sign up under her understudies, and add to her riches. She's good at what she does.

It's certainly not impossible to make a lot of money through YTB, but it's very tough. You need to have a charismatic personality and be willing to talk about your travel company all the time. I actually think I could make pretty good money by joining YTB. I'm social, love giving presentations, and have been told I'm charismatic, but I'd be selling myself out.

When I worked at Tennis Warehouse, we used to get incentives if our order averages were high (dollars spent per order). They never encouraged us to try and "sell" stuff to people, but rather to inform them of the special deals that are available with they're order (essentially a "win-win" since the customer gets a special deal available only with that particular order, and Tennis Warehouse makes a slightly higher sale).

However, many times I was tempted by people calling wanting to get the "latest and greatest" racket technology to start playing tennis. Now I could have sold them a $300 racket, and they would've been happy to get the newest and best! Plus, my order average would've gone way up. But, I couldn't do it. I usually convinced them to get an older yet comparable model for like $60 because, in all honesty, as a beginner they wouldn't feel the difference. Sure my order average tanked, but the customer always appreciated my honesty, and I felt a lot better about being so.

Similarly, this blog is popular enough where I could start writing sponsored posts on different products for money on here, but if you saw my monthly earnings in my adsense account, you'd realize I don't write this for money. I'm not willing to dilute my amazingly insightful content :) with review drivel, just for money.

I'm also not willing to sacrifice my genuineness and social freedom, to make a buck.

I suppose I could join YTB, write a post on how awesome it is and why you should join, then put a link up to my YTB page so you can sign up under me and make me rich!

I am curious though to here about people who have signed up and had a lot of success, like Maurice Maio or Sabrina Dagostino. I suspect you're few and far between. If you'd like to convince me to sign up, give me six understudies (since I don't want to "sell" the business myself, nor do I want to pay the monthly fee), and I'll see how it goes, and write an honest first hand review. In fact, if I knew six people who really, legitimately wanted to get involved in this type of plan, knowing how difficult it is and all of the sales aspects, I'd probably sign up and have them under me. But I'm not going to "sell" it to people.

In the meantime though, I have no interest in joining. Hopefully you can make an informed decision as well. And if you think I'm wrong, feel free to let me know about it! (although, really...am I EVER wrong? :)

Thursday, September 11, 2008

Busy Bee and Boating Captain


Well you've probably noticed that for the last month or so, my posting has been cut to about once per week. Ok, ok...I know that's not a HUGE difference from only twice per week, but it's still HALF as much, plus I try to put out high quality posts rather than high quantities of baloney.

So why haven't I been posting much? There are just not enough hours in the day! Between working on stuff, and having fun, there hasn't been as much time for me to post these buggers as often as I'd like. I've got multiple writing projects going on along with my regular job, plus I've been doing a lot of research into other possible ventures. Mix in fun time with friends, and it makes for a very busy schedule!

September doesn't seem to be letting up either. I've got big plans for the next three weekends for various friends birthdays, including a little hop over to Las Vegas for mine. I'm getting to be an OLD MAN...later this month I'm turning the BIG 2-5! Yikes. I'm half way through my 20's!

If my Brazilian Buddies had it their way though, I would spend my entire late 20's sailing around the world with them. Obviously, they've heard about my natural love for sailing.

So I'm friends with these three Brazilian guys who came to America earlier this year and are planning on setting sail in October on a 4 YEAR international sailing adventure. FOUR YEARS!!! Apparently back in Brazil, they've been featured on various news programs and have sponsorships from various companies for this ambitious feat. Their names are Gustavo (nicknamed "Dooda"), Algusto - "Goodoe," and Claudio - "Foe-Foe." Apparently they had a two-year-old give them their nicknames.

Last weekend I went out to their boat to hang out. Frederico and I were pretty tired, so we planned on just staying a little while and hanging out before leaving. They were having a bunch of people over for a little barbecue (they live on the boat). Getting to the boat is a bit of an excursion itself. They're anchored off shore, so they came and picked us up on a little dingy and took us out to the boat. We get out there, and I'm pleasantly surprised by the party ratio - about 10 girls and 3 guys. Obviously I immediately had a rush of rejuvenation and any fatigue I had miraculously disappeared!

The interesting thing about this crowd is that not ONE person was a regular old white American. I was the most American person on the boat! We had Brazilians, Czechs, Polish, Canadians, and Brazilians from Alabama. (WTF? Brazilians in Alabama?), and me.

After chatting for a while, Dooda decided to bust out his guitar. He knows about two songs...I suppose he can use the four years at sea to work on his repertoire. Frederico then proclaimed to the crowd, "ARUN! These girls want to hear you play and sing!" I wasn't going to reveal that I play, but Fred, being a friend and seeing an opportunity for me to shine, decided to bring it up.

When people ask about my musicianship or see my instruments, I usually tell them I dabble a little. I say the same thing about tennis. I never like telling people I'm accomplished at things like that (unless I'm in a trash talking situation, in which case I'm the best in history :), because there are a lot of people who are better.

Case in point, I've met a handful of people claiming they are "really good" at tennis. As soon as I hear this, I like to stir the pot :)

Me: "Really? I play some. We should hit sometime."
Other Person: "Are you any good?"
Me: "I'm Ok. I can hold my own but I don't play much anymore"
Other: "I've been playing recently so lets play a game! Don't worry if you can't keep up. It's all fun!"
Me: "Ok...you sound like you're pretty good"
Other: "Well I played varsity in high school and beat most of my friends, but don't worry, I won't try and kill you or anything"
Me: "Gee Thanks!"

When we finally meet to hit, on the first ball I can tell if they're legitimate. They almost NEVER are, so when we play a game I hit the ball right back to them and try and keep a rally until they mess up. They have no idea I'm holding back. All they know is I get everything back and eventually they mess up...that is until the last few points where I kick it up a notch, just so they know to stay modest next time :) That's not to say I'm amazing at tennis or anything but most people who claim they're really good at anything, generally are mediocre. But I'm totally digressing.

So the guitar lands in my hands and I start playing sweet home Alabama to wild approval by the Brazilian girls from the Birmingham. I was going to stop but Frederico insisted that I keep going. This is where it helps to have a Brazilian buddy. I know broken Portuguese at best, but he whispered to me that the girls were saying amazing things to each other in Portuguese about me. Naturally, I played an encore :)

Later, Foe-Foe fired up the boom box with some Brazilian music and we all started salsaing on the roof of the cabin! Afterwards, while sitting around chatting, Dooda starts insisting I join them on their travels.

"Arun, I'll never be bored if you're around on the trip! AND, you can teach me some guitar!"

Obviously there's no way I'm going on a four year sailing trip. It does sound awesome, but it's not my style. I suppose I'd get my sea legs eventually, but I'd definitely get cabin fever, not to mention, I don't think I could be a vagabond for THAT long.

"You can even be the CAPTAIN!"

I have to admit, after he said that, I thought about it. I stood behind the cool-big-boat-steering-wheel-thing (that's the technical term for it) and imagined steering the ship as the Captain and calling orders. "Goodoe, raise the mast! Dooda, man the jib! Foe-Foe, toss me a beer!"

Then I remembered how my enthusiasm was dampened during my last sailing adventure.

Thanks but no thanks.

So I'm gonna try and get back to my normal posting frequency. Next week, I may even start a series about YTB travel and whether or not you (or I) should do it. Plus, with all the weekend plans lined up already, and with my penchant for adventure, there should be some good stories :)

Thursday, September 4, 2008

Another VIP Extravaganza

I'm not really sure how it happens, but I somehow wind up in awesome situations. I've already mentioned my encounters as The Accidental VIP Recently though, I've been a legitimate VIP (it's about time people recognize how "very important" I am!) A few weeks ago, courtesy of my friend Andre, we were running around a super upscale lounge in La Jolla, getting complementary beverages and service. This time was even better.

So, my good buddy Frederico calls me up last week and has this to say:

Frederico: "Cancel all of your plans this weekend"
Me: "What!?! Well, the only thing I have really planned is to check out the SDSU vs Cal Poly Game and then I was gonna meet up..."
Frederico: "No meeting up! You've gotta meet me at my boat on Friday after work"
Me: "No way. There's no way I'm going sailing with you again!
Frederico: "No we're not going sailing. We're VIP's at a huge labor day party this weekend at The Hotel Ivy"

Plans cancelled.

Apparently, Frederico's friend Shelby, is a very well connected, Regional manager of Snow Queen Vodka. According to Fred, she's also of the Mustang family (think Car not horse), hence the name "Shelby."

So Friday comes along and we show up at the Ivy. There are masses of people outside, including a ridiculous queue in the "VIP line." Great. Now I'm gonna spend an hour in the VIP line.

Not exactly.

Shelby comes down and hands us these "VIP All Access" badges." We throw them around our necks and all of a sudden we become superstars.

Huh...not bad.

She ushers us up to the top floor where Snow Queen Vodka has booked a number of rooms. We go into one of the sweets and there are people partying everywhere. Girls are walking around dressed like "Snow Queens," and in the back, there's a bar with FREE Snow Queen Vodka.

This could be dangerous...luckily my middle name is "Danger," so I forged ahead.

The evening was insane. These badges let us go everywhere: the club downstairs, the club in the basement, the rooftop lounge, the VIP section ON the rooftop lounge. You know it's a serious party when DJ Jazzy Jeff (of DJ Jazzy Jeff and the Fresh Prince) is the DJ, and some LA Lakers are in the house.

By about 5:00am we decided we were sleepy. I could've stayed in the $500 sweet for $20. I WOULD'VE stayed, except I had made a haircut appointment for early the next morning (Gee, brilliant planning Arun) and I didn't want to miss it. It took me awhile to build up the courage to cut it short (relatively) and if I missed the appointment, I knew my long hair would stick around for like another month.

The next afternoon, now feeling incredibly sleek with much shorter hair, I returned to the Ivy for the afternoon rooftop pool party. I get to the roof and am immediately ushered over to our VIP section. I sit down and help myself to a nice cold glass of ice water. We have an attractive cocktail waitress wearing practically nothing, taking care of us and our drinks. Naturally, I begin harassing her about her ice-selection for my drink.

Me: "Yes, I'm gonna need more ice. I think you were about two cubes too little last time. Also, can make sure that you don't pick any ice with jagged edges this time? I have delicate gums! You must be new here."

I dont' know if she didn't realize I was drinking water, or if she was getting me back, but the next sip I take is definitely NOT water.

(Me coughing hysterically)

Her: "Why don't I add some cranberry to that Vodka!"
Me: (as she's pouring the cranberry) "You need to work on your pouring form...little less arm, little more wrist"

I then start dancing around to get the handfull of ice she put down the back of my shirt out.

Defeated.

After a nice afternoon, I left and met up with a bunch of friends to watch the Cal Poly vs San Diego State football game at Qualcomm stadium. As Cal Poly alumni, we don't get a chance to root for our football team very often, so we've got to take every opportunity we can get. Next to our tailgate in the parking lot, was a group of friends who are SDSU alumni. Obviously we had to have some sort of competition...involving beer...to settle who's school is better.

Suffice to say, we DOMINATED them in Flip Cup. The game was equally amazing as Cal Poly won on a field goal with no time left. (I love football!) Throughout the game, my older, yet juvenile friend Nick was involved in a trash talk battle with four other guys. They were jawing at each other all game (in good fun, I should add). Nick had the last laugh though when Cal Poly kicked the game winning field goal! I was afraid they were gonna beat Nick up, but luckily their Dad was their, so they behaved.

They were all ten years old.

The rest of the long weekend was awesome, but I took leave of the rest of my VIP opportunities at the Ivy. Two days of mayhem was about all I could handle. I could get used to this treatment though. Free stuff...all access...relentless adoration from females around the world...(OK, Ok...so maybe I didn't exactly experience the last one in full force, but it's the next LOGICAL step right?).